Is it permissible for the wife to give the Zakah (obligatory charity) of her money to her poor husband?
Yes, it is permissible for the wife to give from the Zakah of her money to her poor husband. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it valid to share in the 'aqīqah by contributing a seventh share of a camel or cow?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
Yes, it is permissible. If a group of people jointly share in the slaughter of a camel or a cow on behalf of seven individuals, this is valid — regardless of whether all of them intend the 'aqīqah, or some intend the 'aqīqah, others the uḍḥiyyah, and others simply the purchase of meat. And Allah Almighty knows best.
I`m a pious Muslim woman, but my husband isn`t, what should I do?
You should exercise patience, make supplication that Allah guides him to the straight path, and keep advising him kindly.
Does buying meat equivalent to the weight of a slaughtered animal and distributing it avail for an udhiyah?
Praise be to Allah, and prayers and peace be upon our Master the Messenger of Allah.
That does not avail for the sacrifice (uḍḥiyyah), because the sacrifice necessarily requires slaughtering an animal from the category of anʿām (camels, cattle, and sheep/goats) within a specified time.
Rather, that is considered a form of charity (ṣadaqah) for which one is rewarded. And Allah Almighty knows best.