My father has debts and asked me to repay them years ago, and I promised him I would do so upon his death — is it permissible for me to go back on my promise given that I am unable to repay them, especially since he refuses to contribute to repayment on the grounds that the debt has become my responsibility by virtue of my promise?
All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
The established principle is that a father's debt is to be repaid from his own wealth, if he possesses sufficient means. As for the promise made by the son to repay it on his father's behalf, fulfilling such a promise is strongly recommended, and breaking it is considerably disliked. Shaykh al-Islām Imām al-Nawawī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "Fulfilling a promise is emphatically recommended, and breaking it is severely disliked. The evidences for this from the Qurʾān and the Sunnah are well known." [Rawḍat al-Ṭālibīn,Vol. 2/P.278] Shaykh al-Islām Imām Zakariyyā al-Anṣārī, may Allah have mercy upon him, further states: "The reason fulfilling a promise is not obligatory and breaking it is not forbidden is that a promise is in the nature of a gift, and a gift does not become binding except upon receipt." [Asnā al-Maṭālib fī Sharḥ Rawḍ al-Ṭālib,Vol. 2/P.487]
Given that the son does not possess the financial means to fulfil his promise to his father, breaking this promise falls beyond his capacity — and Allah does not burden a soul beyond what it can bear. Since the father himself possesses sufficient wealth to settle his own debt, repayment must be made from his own funds. Should he pass away before doing so, the debt is to be settled from his estate. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for one to give the Zakah (obligatory charity) to his indebted brother?
It is permissible for one to give the Zakah to his brother if he was indebted, or poor.
Is it permissible for a person to give the Zakah (obligatory charity) to his daughter-in-law?
Yes, it is permissible for a person to give the Zakah to his daughter-in-law if she was poor, and none provided for particularly by whom are obliged to provide for her. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible for a mother to stop her daughter from marrying a respectable, God-fearing young man because he isn't college/university graduate?
It is impermissible to deny a woman her right in getting married except for a lawful reason, and problems can be solved through dialogue. However, she can file a suit in order for the judge to have a say in that regard.
