Is it Sunnah to cook the meat of the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah not to distribute the meat of the 'aqīqah raw. Rather, it is recommended to cook it with something sweet — such as raisins or honey — as a good omen and expression of hope for the sweetness of the newborn's character and conduct throughout their life. And Allah Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for a woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law?
It is forbidden for the woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law because he isn`t a Mahram (unmarriageable) of hers.
When does the time for the 'aqīqah lapse and pass?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
If the guardian was financially capable (mūsir) during the majority of the postnatal period (nifās) — which is sixty days — then the obligation of the 'aqīqah remains upon him until the child reaches the age of maturity (bulūgh). Once the child reaches maturity, the demand falls away from the father and those like him. At that point, it becomes Sunnah for the child himself to perform the 'aqīqah on his own behalf.
However, if the guardian was financially incapable (mu'sir) during the postnatal period, and then became financially capable after its expiry — that is, after sixty days — the 'aqīqah is no longer required of him. And Allah Almighty knows best.
Does buying meat equivalent to the weight of a slaughtered animal and distributing it avail for an udhiyah?
Praise be to Allah, and prayers and peace be upon our Master the Messenger of Allah.
That does not avail for the sacrifice (uḍḥiyyah), because the sacrifice necessarily requires slaughtering an animal from the category of anʿām (camels, cattle, and sheep/goats) within a specified time.
Rather, that is considered a form of charity (ṣadaqah) for which one is rewarded, but not an udhiyah. And Allah Almighty knows best.
