Is it permissible for a wife to refuse to go to bed with her husband (for sexual intercourse)?
It isn`t permissible for her to do so unless for a sound reason.
Who is the one deemed "able" (al-qādir), for whom the uḍḥiyah (sacrificial offering) is sunnah?
All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
The one who is deemed "able" (al-qādir) [to perform the uḍḥiyah, i.e., the sacrifice] is someone who possesses wealth sufficient to acquire the sacrificial animal, over and above what is needed to cover his own living expenses and the living expenses of his wife and children — or of anyone else whose financial support (nafaqah) is legally obligatory upon him — for the day of ‘Eid and the three days of Tashrīq [that follow it], since this is the designated time period for the sacrifice. And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.
How should I deal with the whispers of the devil with regard to ablution and purity?
Whispers in ablution are from the devil, and so you should take refuge in Allah from the devil`s evil suggestions that aim to distort the religion. Thus, once an organ is completely pure, don`t question its purity since having whispers doesn`t mean that the purity is invalid as it has already been established.
What is the virtue of Laylat al-Qadr?
It is enough to know its great status that Allah revealed an entire surah about it—Surah Al-Qadr. Moreover, the Quran was first revealed on this night.
Allah says {what means}:
"We have indeed revealed this (Message) in the Night of Power: And what will explain to thee what the night of power is? The Night of Power is better than a thousand months. Therein come down the angels and the Spirit by Allah's permission, on every errand: Peace!... This until the rise of morn!" [Al-Qadr/1-5]
The Prophet ﷺ taught us to observe I‘tikaf in the last ten nights of Ramadan, seeking Laylat al-Qadr. Whoever worships Allah and revives this night will receive the reward of worshiping for a thousand months—excluding Laylat al-Qadr itself.