What is the Islamic ruling on breaking the bones of the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah not to break the bones of the 'aqīqah. Rather, each bone should be separated at its joint — as a good omen and expression of hope for the soundness and wholeness of the newborn's limbs. However, if one does break the bones, it is not considered disliked (makrūh) — it is simply regarded as contrary to what is preferable (khilāf al-awlā). And Allah Almighty knows best.
Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
Does buying meat equivalent to the weight of a slaughtered animal and distributing it avail for an udhiyah?
Praise be to Allah, and prayers and peace be upon our Master the Messenger of Allah.
That does not avail for the sacrifice (uḍḥiyyah), because the sacrifice necessarily requires slaughtering an animal from the category of anʿām (camels, cattle, and sheep/goats) within a specified time.
Rather, that is considered a form of charity (ṣadaqah) for which one is rewarded, but not an udhiyah. And Allah Almighty knows best.
What is the wisdom and purpose behind the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
Among the wisdoms and purposes of the 'aqīqah are the following:
First: Expressing joy at the blessing of Allah the Almighty, rejoicing in the newborn, and giving thanks to Allah for this gift. Allah the Almighty says (what means): "If you are grateful, I will surely increase you." [Ibrāhīm/7]
Second: Proclaiming and publicising the lineage (nasab) of the child — and the 'aqīqah serves as an appropriate and fitting means to this end.
Third: Gladdening the hearts of family members, relatives, friends, and the poor by gathering them together over a shared meal. And Allah Almighty knows best.