Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

Do pregnant and breastfeeding women have to fast?

Pregnant and breastfeeding women are required to fast. However, if fasting causes them harm or unusual hardship, they may break their fast but must make up for the missed days later.
If they break their fast solely out of fear for the fetus or the child, then they must both make up the fast and give fidyah (feeding a needy person for each missed day), as the benefit of breaking the fast was only for the child.

Is it permissible for a suitor to go out with his fiancé upon the conclusion of the marriage contract?

Upon the conclusion of the marriage contract, the woman becomes lawful for her husband. However, the customary practice should be observed in this regard since rights could be lost in case of divorce, or death.

What are the Sunnahs and etiquettes recommended for the person offering the Udhiyah?

 
In the Name of Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
There are several Sunnahs (prophetic traditions) and etiquettes that are highly recommended for the person offering an Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) to observe:
 
First:
It is a Sunnah for anyone intending to offer a sacrifice to refrain from cutting or removing any of their hair or nails once the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah begin. This is based on the statement of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him): "When the ten days [of Dhul-Hijjah] begin and one of you intends to offer a sacrifice, let him not touch any of his hair or skin." (Narrated by Muslim)
 
However, if someone does happen to remove any hair or nails, they have not committed a sin, and their sacrifice remains perfectly valid.
 
Second:
The person offering the sacrifice should ideally slaughter the animal themselves. If they are unable to do so, they should at least witness its slaughter. This is drawn from what our Master, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), said to Lady Fatima (may Allah be pleased with her):
 
"Stand up and witness your sacrifice, for with its very first drop of blood, every sin you have committed will be forgiven." (Narrated by Al-Tabarani in his Mu'jam, Al-Hakim in his Mustadrak, and Al-Bayhaqi in his Sunan)
 
Third:
Face the Qiblah (the direction of prayer) at the time of slaughtering, as the Qiblah is the most honorable of directions.
 
Fourth:
Pronounce the name of Allah (Tasmiyah) at the moment of slaughter by saying: "Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim" (In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful). Even if one forgets to say it, the meat remains lawful (Halal) to eat. Allah, Blessed and Exalted is He, says:
 
"So eat of that [meat] upon which the name of Allah has been mentioned." (Al-An'am: 118)
 
It is also recommended to send blessings upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), and to follow it with the Takbeer (Allahu Akbar).
 
Fifth:
Supplicate for acceptance by saying: "Allahumma hadhihi minka wa ilayka, fa-taqabbal minni" (O Allah, this is a blessing from You and is offered back to You, so please accept it from me). This means: This sacrifice is a blessing that originated from You, and I am offering it to draw closer to You. And Allah the Almighty Knows Best.

What is the ruling on performing the Istikhara prayer after the Witr paryer?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
The Istikhara prayer (Prayer for seeking guidance) is a Sunnah. It consists of two units (rak’ahs) performed outside of the obligatory prayers, after which the person supplicates with the traditionally narrated du’a. It is permissible to perform it before or after the Witr prayer, as the Istikhara prayer is recommended at all times except during the disliked times—the periods in which prayer is prohibited. This is because its specific reason (the Istikhara and supplication) occurs after the prayer itself, and any prayer with a subsequent reason is not permitted during the prohibited times. It should be noted that the two rak’ahs of Istikhara are not fulfilled by performing only one rak’ah, nor by a prostration of recitation (Sajdat al-Tilawah), nor by a funeral prayer (Janazah). And Allah the Exalted knows best.