What is the ruling on istibra' and how is it performed?
Istibra' (cleansing from urine) is recommended. It is for a person to ensure that nothing remains of urine in its passage before performing istinja'. Its method is: to clear the throat (or cough slightly), shake the penis (meaning to pass fingers along it to expel any remaining urine if needed), and walk a few steps to the extent that one thinks nothing of urine remains if walking is needed. Each person knows his own nature best. The preferred opinion is that this differs among people. The objective is for one to think that nothing remains in the urinary passage that he fears will exit later. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
If the menses lasted for over than 9 to 10 days, considered menstruation?
If the duration of the bleeding does not exceed fifteen days, it is all considered menstruation, even if the usual pattern changes.
What is the ruling on a young man and a young woman having a love relation for the purpose of getting married?
It is forbidden for a man and a woman to have any kind of relation whether for marriage, or not because it leads to committing sin. Such relations include: private meetings, mixing, gazing, and seclusion (Khulwa). Accordingly, one who is sincere in his intentions should go to the woman`s guardian and ask for her hand in marriage.
I`m a pious Muslim woman, but my husband isn`t, what should I do?
You should exercise patience, make supplication that Allah guides him to the straight path, and keep advising him kindly.