Who is the one required to slaughter the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah for the 'aqīqah to be slaughtered by the guardian of the newborn — the one upon whom the child's financial maintenance is obligatory — provided he is financially capable of doing so. 'Alī ibn Abī Ṭālib, may Allah be pleased with him, reported: "The Messenger of Allah ﷺ performed the 'aqīqah for al-Ḥasan with one sheep." — Narrated by al-Tirmidhī. And Allah Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for a woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law?
It is forbidden for the woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law because he isn`t a Mahram (unmarriageable) of hers.
What should the one performing the slaughter say at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah to say the following supplication at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah:
"Bismillāhi wallāhu Akbar, Allāhumma laka wa ilayka, hādhihi 'aqīqatu fulān."
("In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of [the child's name].")
This is based on what al-Bayhaqī narrated in Al-Sunan al-Kubrā (Vol.9/P.511), that the Prophet ﷺ said: "Slaughter it in his name and say: In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of so-and-so."
And Allah Almighty knows best.
When is supplication (du‘a) more likely to be accepted: before or after breaking the fast in Ramadan?
Du‘a is accepted at all times, and this is part of Allah’s mercy and generosity toward His servants.
The Prophet ﷺ said: "No Muslim makes a supplication that does not involve sin or severing family ties except that Allah grants them one of three things: either He grants their supplication immediately, or He stores it for them in the Hereafter, or He averts from them an equivalent harm." [Narrated by Ahmad]
However, in Ramadan, du‘a is especially likely to be accepted shortly before breaking the fast.
The Prophet ﷺ said: "Three supplications are never rejected: the supplication of a fasting person until they break their fast, the supplication of a just leader, and the supplication of an oppressed person. Allah raises it above the clouds, opens the gates of heaven for it, and says: ‘By My might, I will surely grant you victory, even if after a while.’" [Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi]
