Is hair extension permissible?
All Perfect Praise is due to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds
It is impermissible for the man and the woman to apply a human`s hair as extension, but using artificial hair is permissible for the married woman after obtaining the approval of her husband so long as non-Mahrams don`t see her. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it incumbent on the fiancée to obey her fiancé?
When the woman settles in her husband`s house, it is incumbent on him to provide for her and it is incumbent on her to obey him. Before that, and if the marriage contract had been concluded, then she is lawfully his wife and thus she should abide by custom in treating him, but if the marriage contract hadn`t been concluded, then she should treat him as a non-Mahram (Marriageable).
Is it permissible for one to masturbate in order not to commit fornication?
This is called committing the milder of the two evils such as eating a carcass in fear of death, and this happens when committing fornication is very likely to occur.
Should the Zakah (obligatory charity) giver tell the poor recipient that this is the Zakah of his money?
No, he shouldn`t. But, the Zakah giver should make an intention in his heart that it is the Zakah of his money when paying it to the poor. And Allah Knows Best.