Is it obligatory for a wife who has been abandoned for many years to observe the waiting period (iddah) after her husband passes away?
If her husband passes away, the wife is required to observe the waiting period (Iddah), even if he had abandoned her, because she is his wife and inherits from him, so she must observe the iddah after his death. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible for the father to give the Zakat of his money to his poor married son?
It is permissible for the father to give part of the Zakat to his poor son, if the latter was sound and healthy, because in this case the father isn't obliged to spend on his young son, even though; he is considered one of the Muslims poor. And Allah Knows Best.
What should a worshiper who has forgotten a pillar of prayer do?
If he/she remembered the forgotten pillar before offering it in the following Rakah (unit of prayer), then he/she should offer it, and continue the prayer, then offer Sujood As-Sahw (Prostration of forgetfulness) at the end of it. But, if he/she remembered that forgotten pillar after having offered it in the following Rakah, then he/she should offer a new Rakah in its (the one in which he forgot a pillar) place, and offer Sujood As-Sahw.
Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.