Is it permissible to eat from an Udhiyah slaughtered on behalf of a deceased person?
Praise be to Allah, and prayers and peace be upon our Master the Messenger of Allah.
It is permissible to eat from the sacrifice (uḍḥiyyah) that is offered on behalf of a deceased person. This is the madhhab (school of thought) of the Hanbalis. In this case, the heirs take the place of the deceased as if he were alive, with the same rights to eat from it, give it in charity, and offer it as a gift.
It is stated in Maṭālib Uli al-Nuhā (Vol.2/P.472): "Offering a sacrifice on behalf of a deceased person is better than offering one on behalf of a living person, because the deceased is unable (to perform deeds) and is in need of reward. It is to be treated like a sacrifice on behalf of a living person in terms of eating, giving charity, and giving gifts." And Allah Almighty knows best.
When does the time for Udhiyah begin?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The time for Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) begins once the sun has risen on the day of Eid al-Adha—which is the tenth of Dhul-Hijjah—and a period of time has passed equivalent to two brief prayer units (Raka'at) and two brief sermons (Khutbah). It then continues until the sunset of the last of the days of Tashreeq, which are the eleventh, twelfth, and thirteenth of Dhul-Hijjah.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "All the mountain passes of Mina are places of sacrifice, and in all the days of Tashreeq there is slaughtering." [Narrated by Al-Bayhaqi and Ibn Hibban].
The best time to slaughter is after finishing the Eid prayer, due to the saying of the Prophet (peace be upon him):
"Indeed, the first thing we begin with on this day of ours is to pray, then we return and slaughter. Whoever does that has attained our Sunnah, and whoever slaughters before [the prayer], it is only meat he has presented to his family; it is not part of the ritual sacrifice (Nusuk) in any way." [ٌReported by Bukhari & Muslim].
It is valid to sacrifice at any time, whether by night or by day; however, it is disliked (Makruh) at night. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for household members to pool money for the Udhiyah and gift it to one of them?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is permissible for members of a household to pool their money together and gift the total amount to one individual among them so that he may offer the sacrifice (Udhiyah). In this case, the family members receive the reward for giving charity (Sadaqah), and the one performing the sacrifice includes them in the spiritual reward (Thawab).
Furthermore, slaughtering a single sheep (on one's own) is considered religously better than participating as one of seven people in the sacrifice of a cow or a camel. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
What is the ruling on a mother giving the Zakat of her wealth to her children?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is permissible for a mother to give her children from the Zakat if they are among those who are eligible for it—such as being poor (Fuqara), possessing no wealth, and not being sufficiently provided for by the maintenance (Nafaqah) of others. This is based on the statement of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ regarding Zaynab, the wife of 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud (may Allah be pleased with them both): (Your husband and your children are the most deserving of those upon whom you spend in charity) [Narrated by Al-Bukhari].
It is stated in [Al-Hawi al-Kabir, Vol. 8/P.537]: 'As for the wife, it is permissible for her to pay her Zakat to her husband from all the designated shares... Our evidence is the generality of the saying of Allah the Almighty: "Zakat expenditures are only for the poor and for the needy", and the Hadith of Abu Hurairah that the Prophet ﷺ said to Zaynab, the wife of 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud: (Your husband and your children are the most deserving of those upon whom you spend), and this is taken in its general sense.' And Allah the Exalted knows best.