What is the ruling on istibra' and how is it performed?
Istibra' (cleansing from urine) is recommended. It is for a person to ensure that nothing remains of urine in its passage before performing istinja'. Its method is: to clear the throat (or cough slightly), shake the penis (meaning to pass fingers along it to expel any remaining urine if needed), and walk a few steps to the extent that one thinks nothing of urine remains if walking is needed. Each person knows his own nature best. The preferred opinion is that this differs among people. The objective is for one to think that nothing remains in the urinary passage that he fears will exit later. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
I`m in love with a certain man, and want to marry him in particular, but my family refused that, what should I do?
The father should know what is in the best interest of his daughter and consider her situation. On her part, the daughter should trust her father`s view point as far as suitors are concerned. Moreover, it is prohibited for any woman, or girl to get involved in a relation with a non-Mahram (Marriageable man).
What is I‘tikaf, and how is it performed?
I‘tikaf is staying in the mosque with the intention of I‘tikaf. It is fulfilled by remaining in the mosque for a period that qualifies as devotion or seclusion (I‘tikaf). It is recommended (Sunnah) for anyone entering the mosque to intend I‘tikaf as long as they remain inside.
What is the waiting period ('Iddah) for a woman whose husband has passed away, and what is the ruling on her wearing gold?
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
The waiting period ('Iddah) for a woman whose husband has passed away is four months and ten days for one who is not pregnant. As for a pregnant woman, her waiting period lasts until she gives birth. It is obligatory for her to remain in the marital home, only leaving for a necessity. During this time, it is prohibited (Haram) to display any form of adornment on the body or clothing; this includes wearing kohl, gold, all types of perfume, and dyeing the hair. Likewise, it is prohibited to receive a direct marriage proposal or to marry during this period.
It was narrated by Umm 'Atiyyah that the Prophet ﷺ said: 'We were forbidden to mourn for a deceased person for more than three days, except for a husband, for whom the mourning period is four months and ten days. During this time, we were not to use kohl, nor wear perfume, nor wear dyed clothing except for garments made of 'Asb (coarsely dyed yarn). We were, however, granted a concession at the time of purification—when one of us bathed following her menses—to use a small amount of Kust (costus) or Azfar (fragrant substances). We were also forbidden from following funeral processions.' (Narrated by Al-Bukhari). And Allah the Exalted knows best."
