What is the ruling on istinja' after urination, and is it done with water and soap or with water only?
Istinja' from urine and stool is obligatory. It is permissible to perform istinja' with water alone, or with toilet paper alone. The best way is with toilet paper then water. If one wishes to suffice with one of them, then water is better. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible to pay the Zakah (obligatory charity) for settling the debt of a deceased relative?
It is impermissible to pay the Zakah for settling the debt of the deceased since Zakah is paid to eligible recipients who are alive. As for the debts of the deceased, they are to be settled from the estate before dividing it amongst the heirs, but if the deceased didn`t leave an estate, then it is desirable for his/her heirs to settle those debts if they can afford them. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible for a wife to refuse to go to bed with her husband (for sexual intercourse)?
It isn`t permissible for her to do so unless for a sound reason.
What should a person who was favored from Allah with a newborn, but couldn`t afford an Aqeeqah, do?
Aqeeqah (the sheep slaughtered on the seventh day from the child`s birth) is a desirable Sunnah for the financially able since Allah, The Exalted, charges not a soul beyond its capacity. Therefore, if the father couldn`t afford the Aqeeqah before the end of his wife`s confinement, then it isn`t due on him, and if he was able to afford it later on, then it is permissible, but if he didn`t until the child reached puberty, the latter can offer the Aqeeqah himself.