Is it permissible for the mother to give her children from the Zakah (obligatory charity) of her money?
It is permissible for the mother to give her children from the Zakah of her money if they are Zakah-eligible recipients, and she isn`t obliged to provide for them.
What is the ruling on istibra' and how is it performed?
Istibra' (cleansing from urine) is recommended. It is for a person to ensure that nothing remains of urine in its passage before performing istinja'. Its method is: to clear the throat (or cough slightly), shake the penis (meaning to pass fingers along it to expel any remaining urine if needed), and walk a few steps to the extent that one thinks nothing of urine remains if walking is needed. Each person knows his own nature best. The preferred opinion is that this differs among people. The objective is for one to think that nothing remains in the urinary passage that he fears will exit later. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for a woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law?
It is forbidden for the woman to shake hands with her brother-in-law because he isn`t a Mahram (unmarriageable) of hers.
What is the ruling on ablution if vaginal discharge is expelled, and is it impure?
If these discharges exit from the external genitalia (apparent part of the vagina), they are not impure and do not invalidate ablution. If they exit from the internal part, they are impure and do invalidate ablution. If it is uncertain whether they are from the internal or external part, they are not impure and do not invalidate ablution.
The apparent part is what becomes visible when sitting, and what the husband's penis reaches during intercourse is considered part of the apparent. The internal part is what is beyond that. And Allah the Almighty knows best.