Is it permissible for a wife to boycott (not to attend to his different needs) her husband?
It isn`t permissible for the woman to boycott her husband unless he is the reason behind that, and it is recommended that both spouses seek the advice of righteous people to make reconciliation.
What should the one performing the slaughter say at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah to say the following supplication at the time of slaughtering the 'aqīqah:
"Bismillāhi wallāhu Akbar, Allāhumma laka wa ilayka, hādhihi 'aqīqatu fulān."
("In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of [the child's name].")
This is based on what al-Bayhaqī narrated in Al-Sunan al-Kubrā (Vol.9/P.511), that the Prophet ﷺ said: "Slaughter it in his name and say: In the name of Allah, and Allah is the Greatest. O Allah, this is for You and unto You — this is the 'aqīqah of so-and-so."
And Allah Almighty knows best.
Is it recommended (mustaḥabb) for the one offering a voluntary sacrifice (uḍḥiyyat taṭawwuʿ) to eat from its meat?
In the Name of Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is highly recommended (Mustahabb) for the person offering a voluntary Udhiyah (sacrificial animal) to eat from its meat, but it is not an obligatory requirement (Wajib). Allah the Almighty says {what means}: "So eat of them and feed the needy who do not beg and the beggar. Thus have We subjected them to you that you may be grateful." (Al-Hajj/ 36)
"So eat of them": This directive is an encouraging recommendation, not a binding command.
The Qani’ (the needy who do not beg): Refers to a poor person who refrains from asking people for help out of dignity.
The Mu’tarr (the beggar): Refers to a poor person who explicitly asks others for assistance. And Allah the Almighty Knows Best.
How is the meat of the 'aqīqah to be distributed?
All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
If the 'aqīqah is a recommended one (mandūbah), it is obligatory to give some portion of it in charity to the poor — even if the amount is small — with the minimum being approximately half a kilogram of meat.
The most preferable manner of distribution is to divide it into three equal portions, as with the uḍḥiyyah:
One third for the guardian and his household to eat from
One third to be given in charity to the poor
One third to be gifted to friends and neighbours, even if they are wealthy
It is furthermore more preferable to send the food to the poor already cooked, rather than inviting them to come and eat. And Allah Almighty knows best.