Is it permissible for a wife to refuse to go to bed with her husband (for sexual intercourse)?
It isn`t permissible for her to do so unless for a sound reason.
What is the ruling on performing istinja' after passing wind from the anus?
Ablution is invalidated by passing wind from the anus, even without a smell. Only ablution becomes obligatory from it. Istinja' is not obligatory nor recommended. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
When is a child instructed to fast?
A child is instructed to fast at the age of seven if they are capable of fasting and have reached the age of discernment, by analogy to prayer. They should be encouraged but not forced, so they can become accustomed to it. It is obligatory for their guardian, whether a father or another, to instruct them.
What is the best manner in distributing the meat of the Aqeeqah?
It is better to divide all of it as cooked meat amongst the poor and the needy. Dividing it into three portions is a Sunnah, but it is permissible to keep all of it provided that a portion, even a small one, is given to the poor and needy (one kilo for example).