Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
Is it permissible for the mother to give her children from the Zakah (obligatory charity) of her money?
It is permissible for the mother to give her children from the Zakah of her money if they are Zakah-eligible recipients, and she isn`t obliged to provide for them.
Is it permissible for a religious young Muslim woman to love a young man for Allah`s sakes?
Such love between the two sexes is from the devil`s evil suggestions, and a pure Muslim woman should beware of such a matter, and she shouldn`t mix with non-Mahrams (Marriageable ).
Should the Zakah (obligatory charity) giver tell the poor recipient that this is the Zakah of his money?
No, he shouldn`t. But, the Zakah giver should make an intention in his heart that it is the Zakah of his money when paying it to the poor. And Allah Knows Best.