Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?
Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.
Does the wife have the right to stop her husband from visiting some of his relatives because their meetings involve religious violations?
Couples should advise one another in kindness, and the wife can stop her husband from committing sin by resorting to a kind and tactful approach.
What is the ruling on smoking?
All Perfect Praise is due to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds
Smoking is forbidden (Haram) since it is harmful to one`s health as confirmed by trustful physicians, and Islam has forbidden taking anything that causes harm. The Prophet (PBUH) said: "There should be neither harm nor reciprocated harm." [Ibn Majah and Ahmad]. And Allah Knows Best.
Is it permissible for the wife to give the Zakah (obligatory charity) of her money to her poor husband?
Yes, it is permissible for the wife to give from the Zakah of her money to her poor husband. And Allah Knows Best.