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Scary Questions about Severance of Kinship Ties
Author : Dr. Mohammad bani Taha
Date Added : 01-11-2022

Scary Questions about Severance of Kinship Ties

 

Am I banned from entering Jannah (Paradise) because I don`t maintain kinship ties? Does this apply to me? Is it true that my deeds will neither be presented before Allah nor accepted by Him? Such scary questions haunt most people, so they send them to the Iftaa` Department via social media. 

 

In fact, there is a number of motivations for posing such questions; the most important of which are:

 

First: Religiosity, thanks to Allah. This is embodied in hoping to win the pleasure of Allah in this world and the next life and fearing to be deprived from His mercy.

Second: There are many texts from the Quran and the Prophetic Sunnah warning against severance of kinship ties and harboring enmity, and that Allah won`t accept the deeds of kinship-ties severer and will deprive him/her from His mercy.

Third: Arguments and disagreements leading to enmity and severance of kinship ties.

Relieving the questioner's` fear can be achieved through assuring them that being afraid of the warning against those who harbor enmity and sever kinship ties is a sign of righteousness reflecting firm belief and closeness to Allah. This can also be done through explaining the qualities of the individual liable for this warning by interpreting the Sharia texts that dwelled on this theme. The most salient of these texts are:

- Sura 13, Verse No. (25)" But those who break the Covenant of God, after having plighted their word thereto, and cut asunder those things which God has commanded to be joined, and work mischief in the land;- on them is the curse; for them is the terrible home!."

- The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Anyone who cuts off relationship from his nearest relatives will not enter Paradise." [Agreed upon].

- The Hadith reported by Al-`Amash in [Jami` Mu`ammar Bin Rashi, vol.11/pp.174].

- Abu Huraim reported Allah's Messenger (PBUH) as saying: "The deeds of people would be presented every week on two days, viz. Monday and Thursday, and every believing servant would be granted pardon except the one in whose (heart) there is rancor against his brother and it would he said: Leave them and put them off until they are turned to reconciliation." {Transmitted by Muslim}.

 

Abu Musa al-`Ash‘ari (May Allah Be Pleased with him) reported God’s Messenger as saying: "God most high looks down on the middle night of Sha'ban and forgives all His creatures, except a polytheist or one who is hostile." [Ibn Majah, vol.1/pp.44].

 

After careful consideration of these texts and scholars` commentaries on them, it is made clear that the one deserving the above-mentioned warning must meet the following conditions:

 

1- Deeming severance of kinship ties lawful without a valid excuse or doubtfulness although he/she knows that it is unlawful. The eminent scholar Al-Khastalani said: "The person referred to in this regard is the one who deems severance of kinship ties lawful without a valid excuse or doubtfulness although he/she knows that it is unlawful." [Shareh Al-Khastalani].

 

2- Severance of kinship ties for a worldly interest. However, doing so out of enjoining kindness and forbidding iniquity to please Allah and be admitted into Jannah excludes such person from this warning. However, this is provided that the rules of enjoying kindness and forbidding iniquity are observed. Of course, this should be done with wisdom and fair preaching.

 

3- Maintaining kinship ties doesn`t result in moral or material harm. It was narrated from Hudhaifah, that The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: "It is not for the believer to humiliate himself." They said: "How does he humiliate himself?" He said: "By taking on a trial which he can not bear." [Sunn At-Tirmithi, vol.4/pp.523].

 

4- Transgressing against near relatives, harboring hatred and enmity towards them, intending every evil for them, and depriving them from any benefit in this life and the next. However, the one who means them no harm and keeps kinship ties at the minimum, for example greeting with Asalamu Alikum, is relieved from the above-mentioned warning. Commenting on Sahih Al-Bukhari, Ibn Battal cited the words of Tabari who said: "The one who keeps kinship ties at minimum, such as greeting with AsalamuAlikum, isn`t considered a severer of kinship ties. Therefore, who is the person intended by the Hadith? He said: the one who deserts near relatives, harbors enmity towards them and deprives them from any benefits in this life and the next."

 

5- Being contented with severing kinship ties and harboring enmity towards near relatives without exerting every effort possible to set the records straight and make reconciliation. However, the one who tries to bring these ties to normal and make reconciliation, even if the other party refuses, isn`t considered a severer of kinship ties. This is because he has done his part and, as well known, Allah burdens not a soul beyond its scope.

 

One should remember that the Quran and the Sunnah contain multiple texts that call for forgiving others, overlooking mistakes, and cleansing hearts from hatred and enmity. This is since The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: "It is not lawful for a Muslim to desert (stop talking to) his brother beyond three nights, the one turning one way and the other turning to the other way when they meet, the better of the two is one who is the first to greet the other." [Agreed upon].

 

This way, fear and despair are eliminated and a person is motivated to eliminate all causes of enmity and severance of kinship ties to keep the society united against all attempts of sowing the seeds of discord amongst its members. This achieves the intention of the Lawgiver in establishing a society in which people`s dignity, property, and blood are considered inviolable.

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

In the Sharia-compliant viewing  at a prospective bride (*al-naẓrah al-sharʿiyyah*), is it permissible for the man to see the woman without a veil (*ḥijāb*)?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is sunnah for the suitor to see the woman he is seeking to marry within the limits the Sharīʿah permits, namely looking at the face and the hands (palms and backs), based on the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him): “Look at her, for it is more likely to bring about harmony between you.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhī.
The suitor may also ask one of the women to look at the woman he is seeking to marry. In that case, she is permitted to see of her what she is normally permitted to see, which is not limited to the face and hands, and she then describes these matters to the suitor. It is narrated on the authority of Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) sent Umm Sulaym to look at a girl, and said: “Smell her breath, and look at her heels.” Narrated by Aḥmad in his Musnad.
It is stated in Tuḥfat al-Muḥtāj (Vol.7/p.192): “For one who cannot easily look, or does not wish to look himself, it is sunnah to send someone who is permitted to look at her, to observe her and describe her to him, even regarding what he himself is not permitted to look at. He thereby gains through the sending what he would not gain through looking. Because of the added need for this, it is excepted from the prohibition of a woman describing another woman to a man.”
The permissibility of looking is conditional upon his resolve to marry her once he is able to, his predominant assumption that his proposal will be accepted, and his assumption that the woman is free of marriage and of a waiting period (ʿiddah). Otherwise, looking is forbidden.
Accordingly, it is not permissible for the suitor to look at anything other than the face and hands. He may ask one of his maḥram women, such as his mother or sister, to see the woman unveiled, and the Sharia-compliant viewing (of a prospective bride) must take place in the presence of one of the woman’s maḥrams. And Allah Almighty knows best.

Is it permissible for a pious Muslim woman to stay with her husband who had quit praying out of laziness?

Quitting prayer is one of the major grave sins that come after disbelieving in Allah, but the wife of such a person isn`t considered divorced, rather, she should exert all her efforts in order to bring him back to the way of Islam. However, if his sin is likely to lure her from the way of Islam, then she had better separate from him by lawful means such as Mokhal`aa (When a wife pays a compensation for her husband in return for divorcing her). Moreover, if she exercises patience, and remains steadfast on her faith, then there is no harm in doing that.

Is it obligatory to make up all missed prayers?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
Making up missed prayers (qaḍāʾ) is a sharʿī obligation, established by the practice of the Prophet ﷺ himself — when the disbelievers preoccupied him on the Day of the Trench and he missed the ʿAṣr prayer, he made it up afterward. This is further affirmed by the ḥadīth: "Fulfil what you owe to Allah, for Allah is most deserving of being fulfilled." (Reported by al-Bukhārī.)
Accordingly, a person who has missed prayers should set aside his voluntary and Sunnah prayers and replace them with make-up prayers in their stead. There is no objection to making up one missed prayer alongside each obligatory prayer that is performed — praying the equivalent missed prayer together with each current obligatory prayer as a practical and manageable way of gradually clearing one's debt of missed prayers. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

How should the udhiyah be distributed?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is obligatory to give the poor a portion of the meat from a voluntary sacrifice (Udhiyah al-Tatawwu’), which should not be less than approximately half a kilogram of raw meat. Other parts do not suffice for this obligation, such as the liver, tripe, or intestines.
It is Sunnah for the one offering the sacrifice to divide it into thirds: one-third for himself and his household to eat, one-third to be given as charity to the poor, and one-third to be given as a gift to friends and neighbors, even if they are wealthy. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

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