Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

Article Number [ Previous | Next ]

Read for Author




Comments


Captcha


Warning: this window is not dedicated to receive religious questions, but to comment on topics published for the benefit of the site administrators—and not for publication. We are pleased to receive religious questions in the section "Send Your Question". So we apologize to readers for not answering any questions through this window of "Comments" for the sake of work organization. Thank you.




Summarized Fatawaa

What is the Islamic punishment for the one who neglects prayer?

 

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Neglecting the prayer (Salah) is among the major sins (Al-Kaba’ir). One who neglects it out of laziness is considered a transgresor (Fasiq), while one who neglects it while denying its obligation is a disbeliever (Kafir). And Allah the Exalted knows best.

What is the Islamic ruling on the Udhiyah (sacrificial offfering)?

 
 
Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
The Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) is a Confirmed Sunnah (Sunnah Mu’akkadah) for every adult Muslim of sound mind who possesses the financial means, whether they are a resident, a traveler, or a pilgrim (Haj). This is based on the statement of the Prophet ﷺ: 'When the ten days [of Dhu al-Hijjah] begin and one of you desires to offer a sacrifice, let him not touch [cut] anything of his hair or skin' [Narrated by Muslim].
 
The point of evidence (Wajh al-Dalalah) here is that the Prophet ﷺ linked the sacrifice to the individual's will and desire by saying, 'and one of you desires.' This indicates that it is not obligatory (Wajib); had it been mandatory, he would have simply said, 'let him not touch his hair until he sacrifices' [without making it conditional upon desire].
 
Furthermore, it is narrated that Abu Bakr and Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both) would sometimes refrain from offering the sacrifice out of fear that people might mistakenly view it as an obligatory duty [Narrated by al-Bayhaqi and others with a good (Hasan) chain of transmission]. And Allah the Exalted knows best.

What is the validity of the formula for sending blessings upon our master Muḥammad ﷺ: *"Allāhumma ṣalli wa sallim wa bārik ‘alā sayyidinā Muḥammad wa ‘alā ālihi, ‘adada kamāli-Llāhi wa kamā yalīqu bikamālihi"* ("O Allah, send blessings, peace, and grace upon our master Muḥammad and his family, by the number of Allah's perfection, and as befits His perfection")?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
It is permissible to send blessings upon our master, the Prophet ﷺ, using the formula mentioned in the question, since sending blessings upon the Prophet ﷺ is an act of devotion legislated in its basic essence, without a specific prescribed wording required outside of the formal prayer itself. It is therefore valid to perform it outside of prayer using any formula. This particular formula involves multiplying the blessings sent upon the Chosen Prophet ﷺ to the number of the perfections of Allah, the Exalted — which are limitless — so that, by Allah's permission, its reward and benefit never cease.
The meaning of "the number of Allah's perfection" is that it is without limit, making the blessings sent boundless, corresponding to His perfection, Glorified is He, which cannot be enumerated or counted. This formula is analogous to the words of our Greatest Prophet ﷺ, as related in the authentic ḥadīth narrated by Imam Muslim: the Prophet ﷺ said to Sayyidah Juwayriyyah (raḍiyallāhu ‘anhā): "Indeed, I said four phrases after you [left], three times, which, if weighed against everything you have said since this morning, would outweigh them: Subḥān Allāhi wa biḥamdihi, ‘adada khalqihi, wa riḍā nafsihi, wa zinata ‘arshihi, wa midāda kalimātihi" (Glory be to Allah, and praise be to Him, by the number of His creation, by His pleasure, by the weight of His Throne, and by the extent of His words). And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the ruling of Islamic Law on a fictitious marriage for the purpose of obtaining citizenship?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
There is no such thing in our noble sharīʿah as a "nominal" or "fictitious" marriage or divorce. Marriage and divorce are among the sacred ordinances of Allah, and it is not permissible to manipulate them or use them as a stratagem to obtain worldly gains.
The foundational purpose of a marriage contract is the permanence and continuity of the relationship between the spouses — to establish a family, and to bring forth righteous offspring. So sacred is this bond that Allah the Almighty Himself described it as a solemn covenant (mīthāq ghalīẓ), saying {what means}: "And if you wish to replace one wife with another and you have given one of them a great amount of wealth, do not take any of it back. Would you take it in injustice and manifest sin? And how could you take it while you have gone in unto each other and they have taken from you a solemn covenant?" [Al-Nisāʾ/ 20–21]
Accordingly, it is not permissible to resort to manipulation and deception in contracts that Allah, Mighty and Majestic, has described as a "solemn covenant" — all for the sake of material and worldly benefit. Marriage is built upon permanence and does not admit of a fixed time limit. If a time limit is stipulated in the contract, the contract is rendered invalid by the consensus of the jurists. Similarly, marriage is impermissible when there exists a mutual, concealed intention to limit its duration — even if no time limit is explicitly mentioned in the contract — for this constitutes a form of unlawful circumvention of the sharīʿah. This is to say nothing of the lying and deception that such conduct involves, the prohibition of which needs no elaboration. Lying, deception, and fraud for the purpose of obtaining worldly gains are among the gravest of sins.
If, however, the marriage contract is first concluded in a valid sharʿī manner and then registered civilly, it is sound and fully valid. And Allah the Almighty knows best.