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To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on performing the Duha (forenoon) prayer before its time has begun, because I go to school early in the morning?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The Duha (forenoon) prayer is not valid if performed before its time has begun. Its time starts when the sun has risen to a noticeable height, that is, approximately fifteen minutes after sunrise, and it ends when the sun reaches its zenith (zawāl), shortly before the Dhuhr (noon) prayer. It is stated in Mughni al-Muhtaj (Vol.1/p.455): “Its time is from the rising of the sun [to a spear’s height] until the zenith.”
Accordingly, the Duha prayer is not valid if offered before the sun has risen, and its time remains open until just before Dhuhr. It may be performed at any time at school, during the break between classes or during recess. And Allah Almighty knows best.

Is it a condition that a woman should untie her locks while making Ghusl (ritual bath)?

Ghusl from Janabah (ritual impurity), or menstruation obligates that water reaches the roots of the hair in order for the Ghusl to be valid, but if it doesn`t, then hair locks must be untied for water to reach them, and for Ghusl to become valid.

Is there a solution to put an end to thinking of worries during prayer?

Firstly, make ablution after the time for prayer begins and busy yourself with remembering Allah, The Exalted, before the iqaamah (start of prayer).In order to become humbly submissive during prayer, you must perform prayer in congregation. After the prayer ends, stay in your place and read the post-prayer remembrances (Adhkaar) and make supplication to Allah, The Exalted.

When is it Sunnah to slaughter the 'aqīqah?

All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is Sunnah for the 'aqīqah to be slaughtered on the seventh day from the birth of the newborn. According to the sounder position, the day of birth itself is counted as the first of the seven days. Thus, for example, if the child is born on a Saturday, the 'aqīqah is to be slaughtered on the following Friday. If the child is born at night, the count begins from the day that follows. And Allah Almighty knows best.