Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

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Summarized Fatawaa

If a woman becomes pure from menstruation shortly after Fajr in Ramadan, what is required of her?

If a woman becomes pure (from menstrual period) after Fajr, even shortly after, it is recommended (but not obligatory) for her to refrain from eating and drinking for the rest of the day. However, she must make up for that day after Ramadan.
She will be rewarded for both refraining from eating (imsak) and making up the fast (qada) since she was menstruating for part of the day.

What is the ruling on the prayer of one who said "Subḥāna Rabbiya al-ʿAẓīm" in prostration (*sujūd*) and forgot to correct it?

 

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
Saying “Subḥāna Rabbiya al-ʿAẓīm” in bowing (rukūʿ) and “Subḥāna Rabbiya al-Aʿlā” in prostration (sujūd) is one of the hayʾāt (non-essential sunnahs) of the prayer. Whoever omits it, whether deliberately or by forgetfulness, or replaces it with another remembrance (dhikr), his prayer is valid and he does not perform sujūd al-sahw. Shaykh al-Islām Imam al-Nawawī (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “Our school holds that one does not prostrate for omitting the audible or silent recitation, the tasbīḥ, and the rest of the hayʾāt.” [al-Majmūʿ, Vol.4/p.127]
If he performs sujūd al-sahw for something that does not call for it, his prayer is invalidated, because he introduced a prostration of forgetfulness without a cause, and he must repeat the prayer. The exception is one who did so out of forgetfulness or ignorance, whether because he recently entered Islam or because he lives far from scholars; he is excused and his prayer is not invalidated.
It is stated in Mughni al-Muḥtāj (Vol.1/p.417): “It is stated in al-Anwār: If he does something that does not call for sujūd al-sahw, thinking that it does, and then prostrates, his prayer is not invalidated if he is ignorant because he recently entered Islam or because he is far from scholars.”
Since this issue is hidden from the laity, as it is among the subtleties of knowledge, and the laity are excused for ignorance of whatever is of such a nature, and their act of obedience is not invalidated because of it, it may be said that the prayer of one who has not acquired knowledge of the issue is not invalidated. As for after knowing it, the prayer is invalidated.
Whoever realizes while still in the prayer that his prostration was out of place, it is sunnah for him to perform sujūd al-sahw. And Allah Almighty knows best.

Is it permissible for a mother to stop her daughter from marrying a respectable, God-fearing young man because he isn't college/university graduate?

It is impermissible to deny a woman her right in getting married except for a lawful reason, and problems can be solved through dialogue. However, she can file a suit in order for the judge to have a say in that regard.

I have a date farm, and the dates come in different categories, and within each category there are different sizes. How is zakāh paid on the yield?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
If the yield reaches the niṣāb (the minimum threshold for zakāh to become obligatory) — which is five awsuq (plural of wasq), equivalent to (611) kg — then zakāh becomes obligatory upon it, at a rate of one-tenth ('ushr) if irrigated by rainwater (i.e., naturally, without the use of machinery), or one-twentieth (half of the 'ushr) if irrigated using machinery/equipment.
If the yield of dates consists of different varieties, then zakāh should be paid from each variety according to its respective proportion. If this proves difficult, it is permissible to pay from a medium-quality variety [representative of the average].
It is stated in Ḥāshiyatā Qulyūbī wa ‘Umayrah (Vol.2/P.22): "Different varieties are combined together [for the purpose of calculating the niṣāb] — such as the various types of dates, the various types of raisins, and so on — and zakāh is paid from each type according to its respective proportion. However, if this becomes difficult due to the large number of varieties and the small quantity of each individual type, then zakāh should be paid from a medium-quality variety among them — neither the best nor the worst — out of consideration for both sides [the giver and the poor recipient]. If one goes to the trouble of paying from each variety according to its proportion, this is also permissible." And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.