Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

The published article reflects the opinion of its author

Article Number [ Previous | Next ]

Read for Author




Comments


Captcha


Warning: this window is not dedicated to receive religious questions, but to comment on topics published for the benefit of the site administrators—and not for publication. We are pleased to receive religious questions in the section "Send Your Question". So we apologize to readers for not answering any questions through this window of "Comments" for the sake of work organization. Thank you.




Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on bypassing a nearby mosque for a distant one?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
If a distant mosque has a larger congregation (Jama‘ah) while the congregation in the nearby mosque is smaller, and the congregation in the nearby mosque is not adversely affected by the worshiper's absence, then it is better for him to pray in the distant mosque with the larger congregation. However, if the congregation in the nearby mosque would be affected by his absence—such as if he is its Imam, or if his presence encourages others to attend—then praying in the nearby mosque is better. This ensures that the congregation is established in two different locations within the community. This is based on the saying of the Prophet ﷺ: 'A man's prayer offered with another man is purer than his prayer which he offers alone, and his prayer with two men is purer than his prayer with one and if they are more (in number), it is more beloved to Allah, the Mighty the Majestic' (Narrated by Ahmad, Abu Dawood, and An-Nasa'i). And Allah the Exalted knows best.

What is the ruling on sending blessings and peace upon the prophet (PBUH) after the Adhan?

 

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is a Sunnah to send blessings and peace (As-Salat wa al-Salam) upon the Prophet ﷺ after the Adhan and the Iqamah, for both the caller (Mu’adhin) and the listener. It is permissible to do so aloud after the conclusion of the Adhan. However, it is preferable to maintain a brief pause between the words of the Adhan and the prayers upon the Prophet ﷺ, so that people do not mistakenly assume that sending blessings upon him is an integral part of the Adhan itself. And Allah the Exalted knows best.

A group of about thirty young men will go to a farm on Friday. Is it permissible for one of us to deliver the sermon (*khuṭbah*) and lead us in the Friday prayer, or is it necessary to go to the nearest mosque?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
The Friday prayer (Jumuʿah) is not obligatory upon a traveler, whether his journey is long or short, if he leaves his place of residence before the time of Fajr begins, according to the Shāfiʿī school. If, however, he sets out on his journey after the Fajr adhān, then he is obliged to perform the Friday prayer, whether in his own town or in any town where the Friday prayer is held.
It is stated in Bushrā al-Karīm (Vol.1/p.383), one of the books of the Shāfiʿī school: “[The Friday prayer] is not obligatory upon a traveler on a permissible journey, whether long or short, if he departs from his place of residence before dawn.” End quote.
Accordingly, if you set out on your journey after Fajr, you are obliged to perform the Friday prayer in the mosque. The same applies if you set out after that, since you would not have fulfilled the conditions for the validity of the Friday prayer, among them: that it be attended by forty men who are free, adult (bāligh), sane, and settled residents of the place where Friday is held. It must be held within a cluster of connected buildings, whether a city, a village, or a district (liwāʾ), for what counts is the gathering of the buildings. And Allah Almighty knows best.

Is washing the private part after urinating (Istinjaa`) a condition, and is it done with water and soap, or with water only?

Istinjaa` is obligatory for removing impurity, and it can be done with toilet paper, or a stone, or water. It is preferable to do Istinjaa` first with paper, or stone, or the like, then to wash the private part with water until making sure that the impurity has been removed. Using soap is not a condition, but there is no harm in doing so provided that it is washed off with water. It is also permissible to use either water, or paper if impurity is removed by any.