What is the ruling on speaking while relieving oneself?
It is disliked for one relieving himself to speak while doing so, except out of necessity. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
What is the ruling on performing istinja' before every ablution?
Istinja' is not from the conditions for the validity of ablution. It is only obligatory for prayer when there is impurity from urine or stool on the private part, or if there is fear of the impurity spreading to the body or clothing. And Allah the Almighty knows best.
What is the ruling if a postpartum woman becomes pure before forty days; are acts of worship obligatory upon her, and is she permissible for her husband?
If the postpartum woman becomes definitely pure before forty days, she must perform the ritual bath and perform acts of worship as a pure woman does. What was prohibited for her also becomes permissible, so she becomes permissible for her husband after her bath. The minimum duration for postpartum bleeding is a moment (an instant), and its usual maximum is forty days. Reaching forty days is not a condition; rather, it is sufficient for the blood to stop or to see the white discharge (qassa bayda'). And Allah the Almighty knows best.
Is it permissible for a wife to give her money to her family as a charity, or a gift without asking her husband, or seeking his consent?
The wife has the right to give her money as a charity, or a gift to her family, or to other people after consulting her husband out of respect, and this is the meaning of treating on footing of kindness and equity. Therefore, if he wanted to stop her from helping her family, then there is no harm in not telling him.