Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on performing Tarawih in sets of four rak‘ahs with only one Tasleem?

It is not permissible to combine more than two rak‘ahs with a single Tasleem in Tarawih prayer. Whoever does so, their prayer is invalid. Shaykh al-Islam Imam Muhammad al-Ramli (may Allah have mercy on him) stated: "If a person prays four rak‘ahs of the Tarawih prayer with a single Tasleem, it is not valid if they did so intentionally and with knowledge [of the prohibition]. Otherwise, it becomes an 'absolute voluntary prayer' (nafl mutlaq); because it is contrary to what has been prescribed." [Nihayat al-Muhtaj, Vol.2/P.127].

What are the Sunnahs and etiquettes recommended for the person offering the Udhiyah?

 
In the Name of Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
There are several Sunnahs (prophetic traditions) and etiquettes that are highly recommended for the person offering an Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) to observe:
 
First:
It is a Sunnah for anyone intending to offer a sacrifice to refrain from cutting or removing any of their hair or nails once the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah begin. This is based on the statement of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him): "When the ten days [of Dhul-Hijjah] begin and one of you intends to offer a sacrifice, let him not touch any of his hair or skin." (Narrated by Muslim)
 
However, if someone does happen to remove any hair or nails, they have not committed a sin, and their sacrifice remains perfectly valid.
 
Second:
The person offering the sacrifice should ideally slaughter the animal themselves. If they are unable to do so, they should at least witness its slaughter. This is drawn from what our Master, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), said to Lady Fatima (may Allah be pleased with her):
 
"Stand up and witness your sacrifice, for with its very first drop of blood, every sin you have committed will be forgiven." (Narrated by Al-Tabarani in his Mu'jam, Al-Hakim in his Mustadrak, and Al-Bayhaqi in his Sunan)
 
Third:
Face the Qiblah (the direction of prayer) at the time of slaughtering, as the Qiblah is the most honorable of directions.
 
Fourth:
Pronounce the name of Allah (Tasmiyah) at the moment of slaughter by saying: "Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim" (In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful). Even if one forgets to say it, the meat remains lawful (Halal) to eat. Allah, Blessed and Exalted is He, says:
 
"So eat of that [meat] upon which the name of Allah has been mentioned." (Al-An'am: 118)
 
It is also recommended to send blessings upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), and to follow it with the Takbeer (Allahu Akbar).
 
Fifth:
Supplicate for acceptance by saying: "Allahumma hadhihi minka wa ilayka, fa-taqabbal minni" (O Allah, this is a blessing from You and is offered back to You, so please accept it from me). This means: This sacrifice is a blessing that originated from You, and I am offering it to draw closer to You. And Allah the Almighty Knows Best.

What is the ruling on waiving a debt owed by a debtor and counting it toward zakāh?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
Waiving a debt owed by a debtor, with the intention of counting it toward zakāh, does not fulfill the zakāh obligation. Rather, it constitutes an ordinary act of charity, for which Allah rewards the giver generously — since one of the conditions for the validity of zakāh is that the person paying it must form the intention of zakāh at the actual moment the wealth is paid out. In this case, the debt has already been established as a standing obligation upon the borrower, so it is not valid to simply redirect the intention toward zakāh after the fact.
It is preferable, instead, for the creditor to first collect the debt from the debtor, and then return to him the amount of money he is required to pay as zakāh — or a portion of it — if the debtor happens to fall under one of the eight categories that Allah, the Exalted, has commanded be given from zakāh.
It is stated in ‘Umdat as-Sālik, from the books of the Shāfi‘ī school: "If someone gives [money] to a poor person, stipulating that the recipient return it to him in payment of a debt owed to him, or says, 'I am making what you owe me into zakāh, so take it [as such]' — this is not valid. But if he gives it to him with the [unstated] intention that the recipient will use it to repay him, or says, 'Repay what you owe me, so that I may [then separately] give it to you as zakāh,' or the debtor himself says, 'Give it to me, so that I may [then] repay you with it' — this is valid, and there is no binding obligation for the recipient to actually fulfill this [informal understanding]." And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the ruling on brown discharge before the menstrual period? Is it considered part of menstruation (Hayd)?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
Dusky discharge (Kudrah), reddish discharge (Humrah), and yellowish discharge (Sufrah) are all considered menstruation (Hayd) if they occur during the time of the menstrual cycle. If their duration exceeds a day and a night, and the period persists from the first sight of the discharge until the cessation of the menstrual blood—provided the total duration does not exceed fifteen days—then all of it is menstruation. However, if the duration exceeds fifteen days, then the discharge is not considered menstruation, but rather chronic irregular bleeding (Istihadah). And Allah the Exalted knows best.