Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the correct point at which to raise the hands when standing up for the third rak‘ah (after the middle tashahhud)?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
Raising the hands while saying the takbīr [when rising for the third rak‘ah] is a recommended sunnah, and omitting it does not affect the validity of the prayer. The proper time for this is after rising from the middle tashahhud, once one has fully stood up.
It is stated in I‘ānat aṭ-Ṭālibīn (Vol.1/P.158): "His statement, 'and rising from the first tashahhud' — meaning, this manner [of raising the hands] is also a sunnah when he rises from the first tashahhud, that is, when he stands upright from it.
Consider [the question]: when precisely does the raising of the hands begin? Is it at the very start of rising from the first tashahhud, or after he has reached the minimum position of rukū‘ [i.e., once fully upright]? The apparent, [correct] view is the latter — even though the outward wording [of the text] might suggest the former — because at the very start of his rising, he is still relying on both hands [to push himself up, and therefore cannot yet raise them]."
It is stated in ‘Umdat as-Sālik (p. 53): "If his prayer extends beyond two rak‘ahs, he sits after them in the iftirāsh position, recites the tashahhud, and sends blessings upon the Prophet ﷺ alone, without [mentioning] his family [at this point]. He then stands while saying the takbīr, supporting himself with his hands; and once he has stood upright, he raises them level with his shoulders." And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

What is the ruling of Islamic Law on a menstruating woman (ḥā'iḍ) reciting the Islamic ruqyah (Qur'anic/spiritual healing)?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
It is permissible for a person in a state of janābah (major ritual impurity), or a menstruating woman (ḥā'iḍ), or a woman in postpartum bleeding (nufasā'), to recite for the purpose of ruqyah (spiritual/Qur'anic healing), even if this includes some verses of the Noble Qur'an — whether recited from memory or by looking at the Muṣ-ḥaf (the physical copy of the Qur'an) without touching or carrying it — provided that the intention behind the recitation is ruqyah, protection (taḥṣīn), and remembrance (dhikr), not the intention of tilāwah (Qur'anic recitation as an act of worship in itself). This remains permissible even if what is recited is an entire sūrah, such as Sūrat al-Mulk.
Imam al-Khaṭīb ash-Shirbīnī (raḥimahullāh) said: "It is lawful for a person in janābah to utter its [the Qur'an's] remembrances and other content — such as its admonitions, its narratives, and its rulings — so long as it is not with the intention of [reciting] Qur'an. [This is] like his saying upon mounting [a vehicle]: 'Glory be to Him Who has subjected this to us, and we could never have accomplished this [by ourselves]' [Sūrat az-Zukhruf: 13] — meaning, [could never have] been capable of it — or upon a calamity: 'Indeed we belong to Allah, and indeed to Him we shall return'... In fact, my teacher, ash-Shihāb ar-Ramlī, issued a fatwā that even if he recited the entire Qur'an without the intention of [reciting] Qur'an, it would be permissible." [Summarized from Mughnī al-Muḥtāj, Vol. 1/P.217] And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

If a person enters a mosque and finds the congregation in the final tashahhud, which is more virtuous — joining them or waiting for a second congregation to catch the opening takbīr (takbīrat al-iḥrām)?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
If a worshipper finds a congregation that is about to finish its prayer, and he hopes to catch the entire prayer from the beginning with another congregation, it is more virtuous for him to pray with this first congregation and then repeat the prayer with the second one — provided he does not intend to confine himself to a single prayer. If, however, he intends to perform only one prayer, then it is more virtuous for him to wait for the second congregation rather than joining the first, so that he may attain the reward of congregational prayer for every single rakʿah.
Al-Khaṭīb al-Sharbīnī, may Allah have mercy upon him, states: "If members of a congregation enter the mosque while the imam is in the final tashahhud, al-Qāḍī Ḥusayn held that it is recommended for them to join him in prayer, and that they should not delay in order to form a second congregation. Al-Mutawallī, however, affirmed the opposite view, and al-Qāḍī's own statement elsewhere supports this latter position, which is the relied-upon view. In fact, it is more virtuous for a person who has missed part of the prayer with one congregation, and who hopes to catch another congregation with whom he can attain the entire prayer within its proper time, to delay so that he may catch it in full with them. This applies when he intends to confine himself to a single prayer; otherwise, it is more virtuous for him to pray with the first group and then repeat the prayer with the others." [Mughnī al-Muḥtāj,Vol. 3/P.186] And Allah the Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on performing Tahajjud after the Witr?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is permissible for one who has prayed the Witr to perform voluntary (Nafl) prayers after it. However, it is preferable for the Witr to be the final prayer of the night. Therefore, if a person is confident that they will wake up during the night for Tahajjud, it is recommended for them to delay the Witr until after the Tahajjud. Conversely, if one fears they may not wake up, they should perform the Witr before sleeping.
 
Al-Khatib al-Shirbini (may Allah have mercy on him) stated: 'It is not disliked (Makruh) to perform Tahajjud after the Witr, but it is not recommended to do so intentionally.' [Mughni al-Muhtaj, Vol. 1/P.454]. And Allah the Exalted knows best."