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Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

In the Sharia-compliant viewing  at a prospective bride (*al-naẓrah al-sharʿiyyah*), is it permissible for the man to see the woman without a veil (*ḥijāb*)?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
It is sunnah for the suitor to see the woman he is seeking to marry within the limits the Sharīʿah permits, namely looking at the face and the hands (palms and backs), based on the saying of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him): “Look at her, for it is more likely to bring about harmony between you.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhī.
The suitor may also ask one of the women to look at the woman he is seeking to marry. In that case, she is permitted to see of her what she is normally permitted to see, which is not limited to the face and hands, and she then describes these matters to the suitor. It is narrated on the authority of Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) sent Umm Sulaym to look at a girl, and said: “Smell her breath, and look at her heels.” Narrated by Aḥmad in his Musnad.
It is stated in Tuḥfat al-Muḥtāj (Vol.7/p.192): “For one who cannot easily look, or does not wish to look himself, it is sunnah to send someone who is permitted to look at her, to observe her and describe her to him, even regarding what he himself is not permitted to look at. He thereby gains through the sending what he would not gain through looking. Because of the added need for this, it is excepted from the prohibition of a woman describing another woman to a man.”
The permissibility of looking is conditional upon his resolve to marry her once he is able to, his predominant assumption that his proposal will be accepted, and his assumption that the woman is free of marriage and of a waiting period (ʿiddah). Otherwise, looking is forbidden.
Accordingly, it is not permissible for the suitor to look at anything other than the face and hands. He may ask one of his maḥram women, such as his mother or sister, to see the woman unveiled, and the Sharia-compliant viewing (of a prospective bride) must take place in the presence of one of the woman’s maḥrams. And Allah Almighty knows best.

If a father stops his daughter from getting married, is it permissible for her to conclude the marriage contract herself?

It is permissible for the father to stop his daughter from getting married if there was a lawful reason for that, and she isn`t allowed to conclude the marriage contract without her guardian. However, if her father denied her right in getting married for an unlawful reason, then she should go to court.

What is the ruling on performing voluntary (nafl) prayer during the time of istiwā' (the sun's zenith) on the day of Jumu‘ah (Friday), and is this ruling specific to someone who has come to the mosque to perform the Jumu‘ah prayer?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
It is permissible to perform voluntary (nafl) prayer during the time of istiwā' (the sun's zenith, i.e., its highest point before noon) on the day of Jumu‘ah (Friday) — whether for someone who is attending the Friday prayer or someone who is not, and whether they are among the people obligated to attend it or not.
It is stated in Mughnī al-Muḥtāj (Vol.1/P.310): "The more correct position (al-aṣaḥḥ) is that prayer is permissible during this time without restriction — regardless of whether the person will be attending the Jumu‘ah prayer or not." And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

Is "Bismillāhir-Raḥmānir-Raḥīm" a verse (āyah) of Sūrat al-Fātiḥah?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
The basmalah ("Bismillāhir-Raḥmānir-Raḥīm") is, without question, a verse (āyah) of the Noble Qur'an, and according to the Shāfi‘ī school, it constitutes a verse of Sūrat al-Fātiḥah itself. Al-Fātiḥah is a pillar of the prayer, and it consists of seven verses, of which the basmalah is one. The prayer is not valid without reciting it, nor if any of the Fātiḥah's verses, letters, or shaddahs (consonant doublings) are omitted or altered.
It is stated in Bushrā al-Karīm (Vol.1/p.202), from the books of the Shāfi‘ī school: "The basmalah is a complete verse of it [i.e., of al-Fātiḥah] in practice — and it suffices, for this to be established, that there be strong probability (ẓann), especially given that this has come very close to certainty (yaqīn), due to the consensus (ijmā‘) of the Companions on its inclusion in the muṣ-ḥaf [the written text of the Qur'an] in its script, despite their extreme diligence in excluding from it anything that did not genuinely belong to it — to the point that they even [carefully regulated] its diacritical dots and vowel markings." And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

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