Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the recommended supplication (Du'a) upon breaking the fast, and is it recited before or after breaking it?

 
All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is recommended (Mustahabb) for a fasting person to recite upon breaking the fast—that is, immediately after eating or drinking—the supplication: "Allahumma laka sumtu wa 'ala rizqika aftartu" (O Allah, for You I have fasted, and with Your provision I have broken my fast).
 
This is because our master, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), used to say this. The narration was recorded by Abu Dawud with a good (Hasan) chain of transmission, albeit in a Mursal form (a narration where a Successor reports directly from the Prophet). Shaykh al-Islam Imam Ibn Hajar al-Haytami (may Allah have mercy upon him) stated: "Its Mursal status is inconsequential, as it pertains to virtuous deeds (Fada'il); furthermore, it was connected (Mawsul) through another chain of transmission." [Tuhfat al-Muhtaj, Vol.3/P.425]
 
It is also recommended to recite: "Dhahaba al-dhama'u wa ibtallat al-'uruqu wa thabata al-ajru in sha' Allah" (The thirst has gone, the veins are moistened, and the reward is confirmed, if Allah wills).
 
This was recorded by Abu Dawud with a good (Hasan) chain. Our leading jurists (Imams) have explicitly stated that it is recommended for the fasting person to combine both supplications.
 
Imam al-Bajuri (may Allah have mercy upon him) stated:
 
 
"And his saying following his breaking of the fast—that is, it is recommended to say: 'O Allah, for You I have fasted, upon Your provision I have broken my fast, in You I have believed, to You I have submitted, and upon You I have relied. The thirst has gone, the veins are moistened, and the reward is confirmed, if Allah wills. O You of vast bounty, forgive me. Praise be to Allah Who aided me so that I fasted, and provided for me so that I broke my fast. O Allah, grant us success in fasting, enable us to stand in night prayer during it, and aid us in it while people sleep, and admit us to Paradise in peace.'" [Hashiyat al-Bajuri, Vol.1/P.562]
 
Furthermore, the fasting person may supplicate with whatever good he or she wishes, for the supplication of a fasting person is answered. Al-Bayhaqi recorded on the authority of Anas ibn Malik that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Three supplications are not rejected: the supplication of a parent for his child, the supplication of a fasting person, and the supplication of a traveler." And Allah Almighty knows best.

What is the ruling on fasting the six days of Shawwal?

Fasting the six days of Shawwal is Sunnah. The Prophet ﷺ said: "Whoever fasts Ramadan and then follows it with six days of Shawwal, it is as if they have fasted for a lifetime." [Narrated by Muslim]
This is because fasting one month of Ramadan is rewarded as fasting for ten months, and the six days are equivalent to sixty days, completing a full year of fasting.

Is it permissible for a menstruating woman to recite the Quran from the computer without actually touching the Quran?

It is not permissible for a woman in her menstrual period, or in postpartum to recite the Quran, even by heart, or without actually touching the Quran itself. Recitation itself is what is prohibited on her regardless of how it is done. However, it is permissible for her to surf through the Quran by her eyes, or to recall it in her head without uttering the words. There is no harm for her to look at the Quranic verses on the computer without touching it, or to utter the words as this is called looking not reciting or reading.

What is the ruling on discharging one's zakāh obligation through the provision of a specific benefit (manfa‘ah) — such as performing a surgical operation for a patient, or providing housing to a tenant, and counting the value of this service as zakāh?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
It is obligatory to pay zakāh from the actual asset (‘ayn al-māl) upon which zakāh is due, except in the case of zakāh on trade goods ('urūḍ at-tijārah), which is paid based on their monetary value. In all cases, zakāh must be given in the form of tamlīk (a full transfer of ownership), based on the words of Allah, the Mighty and Majestic (which mean): "Zakāh expenditures are only for the poor and for the needy, and for those employed to collect [zakāh], and for bringing hearts together [for Islam], and for freeing captives [or slaves], and for those in debt, and for the cause of Allah, and for the [stranded] traveler — an obligation [imposed] by Allah. And Allah is Knowing and Wise" [at-Tawbah/60]. The letter "lām" (لِ) in this verse — as in "lil-fuqarā'" ("for the poor") — indicates possession/ownership (lām al-milk).
It is not permissible to fulfill one's zakāh obligation by providing a benefit or service (manfa‘ah) — such as housing, education, or medical treatment — in place of the zakāh itself. This is because zakāh must be paid as wealth (māl) that is transferred into the ownership of the poor recipient, whereas such services are intangible benefits that are not, in themselves, capable of being formally transferred in ownership (ghayr qābilah lit-tamlīk). And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.