Articles

Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on forgiving a tenant next month's rent, with the intention of counting it toward zakāh al-māl?

All praise is due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our master, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ.
It does not fulfill the obligation to count the rent owed on a house, or a portion of it, in lieu of zakāh. Rather, it is necessary to first transfer ownership of the zakāh amount to the poor person directly; only afterward may he be asked to pay the rent [from that money].
It is stated in ‘Umdat as-Sālik (p. 112): "If someone gives [money] to a poor person, stipulating that the recipient return it to him in payment of a debt owed to him, or says, 'I am making what you owe me into zakāh, so take it [as such]' — this is not valid. But if he gives it to him with the [unstated] intention that the recipient will use it to repay him, or says, 'Repay what you owe me, so that I may [then separately] give it to you as zakāh,' or the debtor himself says, 'Give it to me, so that I may [then] repay you with it' — this is valid, and there is no binding obligation for the recipient to actually fulfill this [informal understanding]."
We would also remind [the reader] of the ḥadīth of the Prophet ﷺ: "The Muslim is the brother of the Muslim: he does not wrong him, nor does he abandon him [to harm]. Whoever attends to the needs of his brother, Allah, the Mighty and Majestic, will attend to his needs. Whoever relieves a Muslim of a hardship, Allah, the Mighty and Majestic, will relieve him of one of the hardships of the Day of Resurrection. And whoever conceals [the faults of] a Muslim, Allah will conceal him on the Day of Resurrection." (Agreed upon). And Allah, the Exalted, knows best.

Is it permissible for a guardian (Big brother) to unlawfully stop his sister from getting married?

If the guardian denies her right in getting married for an unlawful reason, she should go to court in order to settle that matter, and the guardian is considered sinful in this case.

What is the ruling on eating from one`s Udhiyah?

In the Name of Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
The Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) is divided into two categories: the vowed sacrifice (Al-Mandhurah) and the voluntary sacrifice (Al-Tatawwu').
 
First: The Vowed Sacrifice (Al-Mandhurah)
This refers to a sacrifice that has become strictly obligatory due to a formal vow (Nadr). It is completely impermissible for the person offering it, or any members of their family whom they are financially obligated to maintain, to eat any of its meat or fat. Furthermore, it is unlawful for them to personally benefit from its hide, wool, or any other part of it. If they happen to eat any portion of it, the offerer is legally obligated to give an equivalent amount of meat or its monetary value to charity. (As noted in Tuhfat al-Muhtaj by Imam Ibn Hajar al-Haytami,Vol. 9/P.364).
 
Second: The Voluntary Sacrifice (Al-Tatawwu’)
This is a recommended, non-obligatory sacrifice. The person offering it is fully permitted to eat from its meat, distribute portions as charity to the poor, and give pieces as gifts to those who are well-off. However, it remains a mandatory requirement to donate at least a minor portion of it to charity; this should not be less than approximately half a kilogram of raw, uncooked meat. And Allah the Almighty Knows Best.

What is the Sharia basis of the Udhiyah?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
The Sharia basis of the Udhiyah (sacrificial offering) is firmly established through the Quran, the Sunnah, and the Consensus (Ijma') of the Muslims:
1. Evidence from the Holy Quran
Allah the Exalted says {what means}: "And the camels and cattle We have appointed for you as among the symbols of Allah; for you therein is good." [Al-Hajj/36]. He also says {what means}: "So pray to your Lord and sacrifice [to Him alone]" [Al-Kawthar/2]. According to the most well-known scholarly interpretations of this verse, "prayer" refers to the Eid prayer, and "sacrifice" refers to the slaughtering of the Udhiyah.
2. Evidence from the Sunnah
Al-Bara' bin 'Azib (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Prophet ﷺ said: "The first thing we start with on this day of ours is to pray, then we return and sacrifice. Whoever does that has followed our Sunnah, and whoever slaughters before [the prayer], it is merely meat he has provided for his family; it is not part of the ritual sacrifice in any way" [Reported by Bukhari & Muslim].
Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated: "The Prophet ﷺ sacrificed two white rams with horns. He slaughtered them with his own hand, mentioned the name of Allah (Tasmiyah), and said the Takbir" [Reported by Bukhari & Muslim].
3. Evidence from Scholarly Consensus (Ijma')
The Muslims have reached a unanimous consensus on the Sharia basis of the Udhiyah, and no one among the scholars has disagreed with this. [Al-Sherbini, Mughni al-Muhtaj, Vol.6/P.122].And Allah the Exalted knows best.